Sorry Not Sorry

I haven’t written a post in a while. Every day that goes by, I feel a little worse about it. I’ve started a number of posts and then stopped, thinking, “Wait, it’s been X number of days already and I’m going to share this drivel? This tripe? Not good enough!” and so another day slides by.

So what’s going on? Is it writer’s block? I thought about that for a few days and I arrived at “no”. IMO, Writer’s block would suggest that I have nothing to say, nothing I want to share. So I made a list of all of the blog post ideas I had. Guess what? The list is 16 topics strong and growing.

Then I wondered, is it that I am too busy? We all get busy; life offers an endless bounty of things to do. But, I managed to write a 110,000+ book while working at a day job AND participating in my life. Which suggests that time, while precious, can be found.

Could it be that I have nothing to report? Nope, a lot has been happening and I have a lot to share with you all.

So maybe I have too much to share? Nah, that’s not it either. Words are free and I have no limitations on this site. I could post three times a day, should the mood strike.

And then I realized, I was obsessing over a perfect post. That glorious one piece of writing that could catch an eye and launch a career and change the world, or at the very least, my life. As soon as I embraced that truth I began to write.

As I wrote, I realized that the universe had been sending messages to the same effect. Just the other day, I had a humorous conversation with colleagues about how we should re-brand mistakes and failures as growth opportunities. As in, “I had the most glorious growth opportunity today. I shall endeavor to have another tomorrow!”

“Perfectionism doesn’t believe in practice shots. It doesn’t believe in improvement. Perfectionism has never heard that anything worth doing is worth doing badly – and that if we allow ourselves to do something badly we might in time become quite good at it. Perfectionism measures our beginner’s work against the finished work of masters. Perfectionism thrives on comparison and competition. It doesn’t know how to say, “Good try,” or “Job well done.” The critic does not believe in creative glee- or any glee at all for that matter. No, perfectionism is a serious matter.”
-Julia Cameron

So, I’m sorry, not sorry that I haven’t been posting. And I will make a concerted effort to let my creative glee get in front of my tendency toward perfectionism. Which of course means that all bets are off, and you’ve been given notice that I’m giving myself free license to write and publish drivel and tripe. Just think of it as a growth opportunity.

Have you struggled with perfectionism?